Waiting

Lately, it seems as if my life is in a sort of stand-still. I'm not in school, not pursuing my dreams, and not making a whole lot of cash either. I've often felt like a failure in every way one could look at it, because I'm not doing what I want or what society expects from a young adult.

But I'm being obedient. Not with humility, mind you, and not without a lot of yelling directed heavenward. Yet as I've fought, submitted, despaired, and fought again, torn between my desires and His, I've begun to see that even though from my perspective it doesn't seem like anything is growing, there is something happening.

Often when life has us stuck in one spot, we are simply putting forth roots.

This is an expression of my experience during this season of waiting.


Dead
     nothing growing
     long overdue
     no leaves
     no flowers
     no fruit
                    Chop it down

Wait
     it's alive
     it's growing
     getting stronger
     inside
     invisible
                    Putting forth roots

Rain
     bring clouds
     no sunshine
     for now
     darkness
     sorrow
                    Grow firm roots

Sun
     it will come
     not yet
     first strong roots
     then leaves
     then sun
                    Wait for sun

Growth
     flowers will bloom
     glorious unfolding
     replaced by fruit
     growing slowly
     then at last
                    Produce a hundredfold



"The seed on good soil stands for those with a noble and good heart, who hear the word, retain it, and by persevering produce a crop." -Luke 8:15
see also Luke 13:6-9; Matt 13:23